I still haven't the foggiest how the letter went over. But I'm not receiving a cold shoulder and I can see how what I said would take someone completely off guard.
I am enjoyed in person...
No one may believe this, but I suffer from morbid shyness. I can't talk about this touchy-feely stuff in person. That's why I wrote the letter. But I don't think I'm going to get my answer until I man up and do the face-to-face. I'm terrified.
Like, I'm going to have to take some Ativan tonight kind of terrified.
Also, I'm really busy and I'm not certain when I can afford to sit down to the real deal and take whatever is handed to me.
Rather than lay awake with insomnia, tonight I may cry myself to sleep. Maybe this is a clue to me that I'm not ready for this sort of risk.
I did the whole "What have I got to lose?" talk with myself and I thought I was brave enough for this. I think now that I was wrong.
We'll see in the morning.